There is one critical mistake that almost all

men make with the women that they're REALLY

attracted to.

This particular mistake is at the root of so

many different problems that men run into, that

the topic probably deserves a book to be written

about it alone.

That mistake is allowing yourself to become

OVERLY EMOTIONAL around a woman at the wrong time

and screwing up the great situation that you have,

by revealing the fact that you're out of control.

When most of us guys see an attractive woman

that we'd like to meet, we FREAK OUT, become very

nervous, and literally become IMMOBILIZED.

This is a case of not being able to control

your EMOTIONS.

When most of us guys have the phone in hand,

and we're getting ready to call a girl to ask her

out, we FREAK OUT, and again, we become so nervous

that we're IMMOBILIZED.

This is another case of not being able to

control your emotions.

When most of us guys think that it might be

time to KISS a girl, we FREAK OUT.

When a woman won't call back, we get upset.

When a woman tests us by challenging something

we say, we become nervous and unsure.

The point I'm making here is that if you allow

yourself to become TOO emotional in situations

with women, it will screw you up. Guaranteed.

It's happened to all of us many times, and it's

a UNIVERSAL experience.

But wait a minute.

Emotions are GOOD THINGS, aren't they?

Aren't emotions the thing that allow us to

really ENJOY life?

And isn't it wrong to try to "control how you

feel"? Isn't it better to just "be who you are"

and not try to beat yourself up because you feel a

certain way?

Have you ever heard a woman (or a man) say "I

can't help the way I feel"...?

We all have.

We even have TERMS that we use to describe when

we're overly upset and just need to "get it out".

We call it "venting" and such.

The implication here is that in our modern 21st

century society, it's OK to be upset, to get

emotional, and to show how you feel...

But is this always true?

TWO KINDS OF EMOTIONS

I think that emotions come in "two flavors".

There are those that you could consider

"positive" emotions or those based in "joy", and

there are "negative" emotions or those based in

"fear".

In other words, there are the emotions that

make you "feel good" and emotions that make you

"feel bad".

In addition, we all know that emotions aren't

like on/off switches.

In other words, when you feel an emotion, you

usually feel an AMOUNT of it. Maybe it's just a

little, or maybe it's very strong.

But the reality is that when an emotion starts

to become too strong, it literally TAKES OVER your

mind and body.

In some situations, this can be a very powerful

POSITIVE thing for a person.

Imagine your favorite musician or actor giving

a world-class performance... you can literally

FEEL the emotions they're feeling. It can be an

amazing experience when they allow their emotions

to take over.

But it can also be a very powerful NEGATIVE

thing as well.

Like when you're looking across the room at a

beautiful woman you'd like to talk to and you

become so nervous that you make yourself sick.

Emotions can actually CONTROL you.

And when an emotion becomes so strong that it

actually DOES "take over", you're out of control.

Remember that.

Before I tell you more, I want to mention one

thing: If you have a lot of problems controlling

your emotions, or you find that your emotions

take over and cause you to screw things up with

women, then go and read this right now:

Strong emotions also create strong MEMORIES.

We tend to remember things better if we were

feeling a strong emotion when they happened.

I can remember so many situations where I was

too nervous to talk to a girl, or too nervous to

ask her out, or whatever.

I can remember situations TWENTY YEARS AGO

vividly... where I was so nervous in the situation

that the emotion burned the image into my mind.

When this kind of thing happens a lot (like it

has with me), it starts to make a "feedback loop".

In other words, most of the strong memories I had

about women were situations where I SCREWED UP...

so I had less and less confidence as the years

went by.

Give me a little silent nod here if you know

what I'm talking about.

CONTROLLING YOUR EMOTIONS

I'm sure you've already figured out that I'm

going to suggest that you learn how to control

your emotions in situations with women.

Let me talk for a moment about the reasons WHY

it's important to do this.

Remember, when it comes to ATTRACTION, all of

the "normal" rules change.

You have to stop thinking about what you've

learned about being a "nice guy" and realize

that a woman's ATTRACTION isn't triggered by you

being "nice".

So I have TWO good reasons why you need to

learn how to control your emotions around women:

1) If your emotions take control early on, you

probably won't even be able to talk to her, call

her, or ask her out. You'll just be too freaked

out to even make your first move.

2) Women aren't ATTRACTED to guys who let their

emotions control them all the time. This is

ESPECIALLY true when the guy acts like a WUSSY.

We talked about the first reason already.

Let's talk about the second one.

Why don't women like guys who are overly-

emotional Wussies?

Because women NEVER feel ATTRACTION for men

that they can CONTROL.

The more control a woman has over you, the less

ATTRACTION she feels for you.

The less of a CHALLENGE you are, and the more

PREDICTABLE you become, the less ATTRACTION she

feels. It's very simple.

To put it another way; if you're the type of

guy who lets his emotions TAKE OVER, then you need

to learn how to control them.

If you don't, you're going to have a VERY hard

time succeeding with women.

THE FIRST STEP...

I think that the first step in learning how to

control your STRONG emotions is to realize how

they're triggered.

Most strong emotions are TRIGGERED.

Something happens that "pushes a button" inside

of you and BAM!... the emotion happens before you

even have a chance to think about it.

But the fact is that these "triggers" have a

structure to them.

There are all kinds of little things that

happen during that "trigger".

One of the biggest insights that I've had about

these "triggers" is that they're usually caused by

making something that happens MEAN something.

In other words, it's not the actual situation

itself that "pulls the trigger" or "pushes the

button"... it's what you think it MEANS.

For instance, let's say that you've met a cute

girl, gotten her number, and called her on the

phone... she wasn't home, so you left a message

for her.

She doesn't call back.

What do we, as guys, usually think?

"Maybe she doesn't like me. Maybe she has a

boyfriend. Maybe she's trying to avoid me. If I

call her again, maybe she'll reject me."

In other words, we make the fact that she

didn't call back MEAN all these different things.

Another HUGE insight I've had in this area is

that us guys allow our imaginations to take over

and imagine the WORST possible outcomes of

situations.

Then we get nervous about that outcome

happening and we FREAK.

For instance... have you ever seen a girl that

you wanted to approach... but all you could

imagine was her REJECTING you?

Or you were with a woman on a date, and you

wanted to kiss her... and all you could imagine

was her getting upset or pushing you away?

Don't worry, we all do it.

The point is that most of us guys use our minds

to imagine the WORST possible outcomes for

situations... and it pushes all the wrong buttons,

and gets us all nervous and upset... which, of

course, makes us screw everything up.

When it comes to women, it's important that you

lose the need to make everything MEAN something...

and STOP imagining the worst.

Think about those situations when a woman

doesn't call you back... or plays hard to get.

As guys, we immediately start to wonder where

she is... what she's doing... and who she's with.

We make up pictures in our minds of her out with

other guys, doing fun things without us, etc. and

we let it upset us.

Bad idea.

This is the kind of thing that makes us do all

KINDS of stupid, Wussy things that scare women

away... like calling 100 times a day, asking where

she was and what she was doing, etc.

Instead, start doing yourself a favor and:

1) Imagining the BEST possible outcome.

2) Making things mean something GOOD.

If she doesn't call you back, imagine that she

probably didn't get the message (maybe her

roommate erased it), and make it mean that when

she finally DOES hear from you, she's going to be

even MORE interested because it took you so long

to call her.

If she plays hard to get, realize that she's

only doing that because she REALLY likes you...

and that it's almost inevitable that you're going

to get together with her.

Does this stuff sound strange?

Well, I'll tell you something...

All of the guys I know who are the BEST with

women think this way. This is how their minds

operate.

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I used to be VERY negative. I thought that

every situation was going to go wrong, and that

everything women did meant that they somehow

didn't like me.

It's taken me awhile, but I've changed my own

thinking so it's now more positive and optimistic.

And guess what?

Now women are FAR more attracted to me.

In fact, it's almost like magic. The more I

expect things to go well, the better they go. Try

it, it works.

Also, start noticing those particular things

and situations that trigger your "overpowering"

emotions.

Learn to spot the signs that it's about to

happen, and then learn how to keep yourself cool,

calm, and collected.

If you can learn how to do this, your success

with women will improve DRAMATICALLY.

Now, this is just the tip of the iceberg, so to

speak.

It's also important to learn how to improve

your self image, overcome FEAR, maintain your

physical composure, and communicate using your

body language... so that you're successful in each

situation with women.

Where can you learn every one of my best

personal techniques for this stuff?

Try my Advanced Dating Techniques program.

In that program I'll teach you all of the

techniques that I use personally to get these

areas under control... and to take each situation

that you find yourself in with women and turn it

into a success.

You'll learn step-by-step techniques and

systems that you won't find ANYWERE else. I

guarantee it.

If you REALLY want to learn some powerful

techniques for controlling your emotions around

women, then this is the way to learn them.

All the details are here, along with some great

And if you haven't read my online eBook "Double

Your Dating", then you need to do that right now.

You can download it and be reading it in just a

I'll talk to you again soon.

Your Friend,