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3. Acknowledgment and appreciation, reward:
It is easier to keep a child motivated when offering a tangible reward. Knowing that achieving the goal will meet with a tangible form of acknowledgment, appreciation and reward, will add this extra drive.
A close relative of the word "motivate" is "encourage". What comes to your mind when you think of the word "encourage"? The thing that comes to my mind is praise. All of us, adults as well as children, respond well to praise, and feel encouraged when we receive praise. If you want to encourage your child to succeed, praise him and celebrate every action that leads in the right direction. Every small achievement. Most of us (including our kids) tend to be self judgmental. We criticize ourselves, and any small set back often seems like a serious failure. Your child will feel encouraged if his efforts are appreciated, and achievements are acknowledged.
Praise on the way to achieving the goal is important. In addition, make sure the child knows the rewards for achieving the goals will be significant. Determining what the rewards are depends on you. You are the only one who can determine what is affordable, realistic for you, and very desirable for your child. The rewards have to be age appropriate.
4. Persistence:
The route towards any worthwhile goal includes some minor set-backs and disappointments. The child needs to learn to get up, brush himself off, and get right back on the horse. When a child knows that a goal is important, feels that it is possible for him to achieve it, and is offered an incentive to work towards the goal, the chances are that he will be motivated to put in the effort needed to achieve the goal. Add to it persistence, and the results are as much as guaranteed.
Persistence is to a large extent a learned trait. Our children need to learn persistence; they need to learn that if we suffer a set back, we don’t give up. Instead, we increase our efforts. Who can teach them that, if not us?
An effective tool to teach persistence, is story telling. Story telling can take the form of a book, a movie, a discussion. There are many inspiring books and movies available about people who persisted and achieved, against all odds. Keep your eyes open, and when you find an inspiring story, share it with your child.
Holding discussions with your child is also very effective. When your child suffers a temporary setback, it will help him if you can put it in perspective for him. Knowing that a setback is minor, takes some judgment. Good Judgment is often a result of experience, and obviously children and young people need our help to develop good judgment. Explain to your child that this is just a minor, temporary setback. Help your child learn the lesson necessary to learn from this, and concentrate on preparing for the upcoming success. Encourage your child to concentrate on the goal, instead of any small setbacks on the way.
Just like parenting, inspiring and motivating our children is a life-long job. If you start at an early age, put together a "plan of attack," use the "tools of the trade" and add a healthy amount of love, the results will come. Satisfaction is guaranteed.
Esther Andrews has grown 2 highly gifted children, and managed the ‘School of Gifted Education’ for many years. In her newsletter, ‘Develop Your Child’s Genius’ she shares her experiences and provides information about fun and easy activities you can do with your children, to develop their intelligence in a few minutes a day. You can subscribe here.
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