|
To Be Or Not To Be!
by Victor Daniel and Elizabeth Zaborowska
What are three major concerns on most
everyone's mind nowadays? Answer: Money, Time and
Love. Sound familiar? That seems to be what everyone
wants to have more of in their lives. "If only I had
more money, then I could do the things I always wanted
to do, then I would be happy." If only I had more
time, then I could go on vacation or take up a hobby,
then I could feel more at peace." If I could just have
a relationship with someone, then I could finally feel
love.
This Have-Do-Be paradigm seems to be all backwards! I
think we're putting the cart before the horse. For
those of you who don't have a Webster's handy, a
paradigm is a principle within which we live. We seem
to live within this universal notion, this collective
conscious principle, that we must HAVE something (like
time) in order to DO something (go on vacation) that
will allow us to BE that which we seek to be (happy,
at peace). Well, who says it has to be in that
Have-Do-Be order? Who says that having more time will
make you feel at peace, just because it will allow you
a vacation? If you had more time, don't you think you
would find a zillion other things that you had to do
to fill it? And if you had a zillion things to do, but
went on vacation anyway, would you really feel at
peace, or would your list of things to do occupy your
thoughts and ruin your vacation?
 I
say that having time to go on vacation in order to
feel happy or at peace is nonsense! Instead I say that
feeling happy or at peace will allow you to go on
vacation and create more time for yourself! Aha! This
is the Have-Do-Be, I mean the Be-Do-Have paradigm! Not
only does it make more sense, but you will find that
it will really serve you to open your mind to this
type of living! Unfortunately, we have been programmed
with this notion that the end result of having
something is becoming something else, so the first
thing we need to do is figure out why we have been
thinking these backwards thoughts our whole lives and
change our ideas about it.
Think about this backward notion for a moment:
Have-Do-Be. If you haven't felt that 'happiness' yet,
then how do you know that having more money will give
it to you? If you haven't felt that 'peace' yet, then
how do you know that having more time will give it to
you? And if you haven't felt that 'love' yet, then how
do you know that being in a relationship will give it
to you? In other words, how can we possibly experience
something that we haven't yet been? But, wait a
minute! Won't the experience cause me to know
happiness, peace, love or, for that matter, any other
emotion? Well, sure, if that's what you really
believe, then that is what you will create for
yourself. But do you really want to live that type of
causal relationship between having and being? Do you
really want to subscribe to the Have-Do-Be paradigm,
or do you want to change that antiquated belief system
and start creating your own experiences instead of
allowing material things to create them for you?
What if I told you that 'knowing' doesn't follow
'experience'; it precedes it! We don't know happiness
just because something made us feel that way. We've
always known happiness, and we draw to ourselves the
experiences with which we associate that feeling! If
you think this is wrong, then ask yourself who teaches
a baby to smile? No one! We come into this world
knowing happiness - and all the other emotions we feel
- and we learn to associate these feelings with
certain experiences. As a result, we erroneously
believe that it is the experiences that cause us to
know this happiness. When we live in the present
moment, moment to moment, deliberately creating the
feeling of happiness from within then we start to
experience it outwardly. Happiness and all other
states of being are self-bestowed.
FIRST LOG IN IS
FREE
& FULLY PRIVILEGED
NO CREDIT CARD REQUIRED
EXPRESS
REGISTRATION - INSTANT ACCESS
To go back to the earlier examples, knowing happiness
does not follow the experience of having more money,
knowing peace does not follow the experience of having
more time, and knowing love does not follow the
experience of having a relationship! This knowing
precedes the experience!! Haven't you ever noticed the
correlation between how you wake up in the morning to
how things happen for you the rest of the day? Haven't
you noticed that on those days that you wake up, and
you don't know why, but you're just in a great mood,
everything seems to go your way? On the other hand,
sometimes when you wake up, you just know that it's
going to be a bad day. Why is that? It's simple. You
create those experiences - good or bad! If you believe
it's going to be a bad day, then a bad day it will be.
By the same token, if you truly believe it's going to
be a great day... Hmm! I think we're getting somewhere
here.
Your emotions will truly help you to attract the
experiences in life that you consider valuable! That's
why your perpetually happy neighbor always has great
things come her way. That is how that co-worker you
have always wondered about, who is always at peace
with himself and everyone else, always has time enough
for everything and everyone. And you know your friend,
the one who is so filled with love that he practically
radiates? The one who everyone wants to be around?
Creating the love is how he attracts loving
relationships - in both the romantic and platonic
senses!
So now we can get back to this Have-Do-Be paradigm and
figure out how to unlearn the beliefs we are
accustomed to creating and turn the tables in our
favor. First, let's get rid of the idea that
"havingness" produces "beingness", and realize that it
is actually the other way around. As we have already
learned, we must become (or know) this thing called,
"happy" ... or peace, or love, or even wise,
compassionate, etc. Once we reach this state, we will
realize that from this place of "beingness", we will
begin to do the things that bring us to "havingness".
We will create our own realities.
If you are not the kind of person who can very easily
just close your eyes, and bring yourself to this state
of "beingness", then just cheat a little by abusing
that Have-Do-Be paradigm. If you thought that having
more money would bring you happiness, then close your
eyes, and imagine the happiness that you had idealized
by having that money. Your mind is a very powerful
tool, and it's time you used it to your advantage.
Your mind allows you to roam in imagination, and your
imagination can create whatever experiences you will
it to create! So why not create happiness, peace,
love, or anything else you deserve? Create the
happiness in your imagination, and allow yourself to
flow directly into that state of "beingness". Close
your eyes and feel that happiness, peace, or love that
you have created and have "become".
In the spiritual (and not necessarily religious) book
Conversations with God the author, Neale Donald Walsch,
resonates with this idea that your emotions create
your experiences. He asserts that "All states of mind
reproduce themselves." In this sense, happiness is a
state of mind and like all states of mind, it can
reproduce itself in physical form. Again, your beliefs
create your reality. When you allow your reality to
create your beliefs, you are living defensively and
reactively. On the other hand, when you deliberately
create a belief or state of being, then you are living
deliberately and proactively!
Ok, so now you have created this belief that you are
happy (insert any state of mind here). Now what? Well
now you feel happy and have become happy, so act
happy. Since this happiness is sincere, you will find
that you draw into your being the experiences you
desire. Why did I now mention that the happiness must
be sincere? Because anything that you do must be done
with sincerity of heart, or else the benefit of the
action will be lost. Natural law requires that mind,
body and spirit be united in thought, word, and action
for the process of creation to work. You can't fool
your mind. If you are insincere, your mind knows it.
But if you are sincere, then your mind knows that as
well.
Let's go back to the idea that when you create your
own beliefs and realities, you draw into your being
the experiences you desire. Now combine this idea with
the sincerity of your actions. How does this work?
Well, whatever you choose to create for yourself, give
to another. If you choose to be happy, help someone
else to be happy; if you choose to be prosperous, help
another to prosper; if you choose more love in your
life, cause another to have more love in his or her
life. And do this sincerely, not because you seek
personal gain, but because you have a sincere desire
to give others what you yourself seek. The universe is
an amazing machine that will return to you all the
things you give away. Think about this: giving
something of yourself is an experience. If you do not
have something, then you cannot give it away. Since
you can't give to another something you do not now
have, your mind comes to a new conclusion, a new
thought about you. Namely, that you must have this or
you could not be giving it away. This new thought then
becomes your experience. In other words, if you want
to give love, but you do not have it, then having love
becomes your new experience. Your mind begins to
create the love you need to give. And once you begin
this creative process, you engage the gears of the
most powerful creation-machine in this universe, your
divine self. What ever you are "being", YOU are
creating. The circle is complete and you will create
more and more of these types of experiences in your
life. Your creations will manifest themselves in your
physical experience. This is the greatest secret of
life.
It's time to dis-create your old belief system and
re-create yourself. "To be or not to be" is many
things. It is the question, it is the answer, and it
is your choice. Will creating happiness bring you
money, peace bring you time, or love bring you a
relationship? Forget the Have-Do-Be paradigm! Reverse
your belief system and live the Be-Do-Have paradigm
proactively and find out for yourself. Allow your
state of mind to create your own experiences, instead
of letting your experiences create your state of mind.
by Victor
Daniel and Elizabeth Zaborowska Copyright 1999, 2000,
2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005 & 2006.
|
